New York Times:
By Liz Robbins
November 23, 2015
They
moved from street to street in Syria, dodging bullets and bombs.
Finally, they fled to Jordan, where they lived an anxious existence as
unwelcome refugees. And then,
after three years of interviews and security checks, a Syrian family — a
33-year-old man, his 23-year-old wife and their almost 5-year-old son —
were granted refugee status in the United States.
On Tuesday, they were on their way. The timing could not have been worse.
They
were flying directly into a swirling public debate over the safety of
admitting Syrian refugees to the United States in the wake of the Paris
terrorist attacks. Gov.
Mike Pence of Indiana had joined the growing ranks of governors who
announced that Syrians would not be welcome in their states. That
morning, Governor Pence’s social service agency directed the
Indianapolis resettlement organization not to accept these or
any other Syrian refugees.
What
still seems jarring to me — and, of course, more to this Syrian family —
was that his decision had altered their future when they were in
midair. On their first-ever
airplane trip.
I was determined to show the people behind the policy.
Having
reported on refugee resettlement over the past two months, I was
familiar with the recent efforts by a New Haven agency to resettle
Syrian families. I called on
a hunch and learned more than I expected. Integrated Refugee and
Immigrant Services in New Haven had eagerly arranged to accept this
family, the first to be diverted.
On
Wednesday, Gov. Dannel P. Malloy of Connecticut personally welcomed the
family to great fanfare, recounting to me how “beautiful” they were,
and how firm a handshake
the boy had.
Afraid
of endangering their families in Syria and in Jordan, the couple agreed
to speak to me for the article I wrote for Saturday’s paper, but only
on the condition that
I used initials rather than their names and agreed not to run any
photographs of them, even shaded ones.
We
spoke in a sunny playroom on the second floor of the immigrant
resettlement agency while their son played with wooden blocks and a toy
school bus.
Charming
and charismatic, the family told me that some Americans have mistaken
ideas about refugees and Muslims. They spoke about their five-year
journey and how they
were devastated and depressed to be rejected by Indiana.
But,
within 20 hours of their arrival, they were soon overwhelmed by the
kindness with which they were welcomed into their new home. “Now we have
fallen in love with Connecticut,”
the father, A., said. “Now if they tell us to go back there, there is
no way we would go to Indiana.”
A.
told me he sold used clothes in Syria. With a grin, he said he learned
to tell everybody they looked good in whatever they tried on. A salesman
in any language. A.
himself looked sporty in black suede shoes. They were European, he
said, and had been donated in Jordan.
A.
spoke in Arabic, but looked directly at me instead of the translator
when he spoke, as if there were no language barrier. He said he was the
one who taught his son
to give a firm handshake.
The
mother, F., described having to flee her country and to live in Jordan
as a second-class citizen. Her son could not go to school; her husband
could not work legally.
In a heart-wrenching moment, she said she had suffered four
miscarriages.
The couple had been married for six years. Their obvious affection for each other was evident.
They
were not able to enjoy the beach honeymoon they had planned in Syria.
They were busy, and then there was war. On Friday, they drove by what
passed for a beach in
West Haven.
“See?” A. said, recalling their conversation earlier in the day. “I took you, here it is.”
F.
smiled and rolled her eyes. “You,” she said with deadpan humor, “can
sleep on the couch tonight.” We all cracked up, a cathartic moment to an
emotional day.
As
I traveled to New Haven for the interview on Friday, I thought about my
grandfather Sam, who had fled the pogroms in Ukraine as an adolescent.
At
the end of the interview, I told A. and F. this, and about how he had
found a new, welcoming home — in Connecticut. F. smiled and said,
“That’s why you understand.”
We
are, of course, all immigrants, at least in some way. We all have
stories. Some like that of the Syrian family apparently have special
resonance: Since the initial
article I wrote and the interview on Friday, donations and letters of
support have been pouring in to IRIS, the New Haven agency, which will
use the money to help resettle more refugees this year.
Some
emails and donations came from Indiana, from citizens who said they
were ashamed of their state. They felt compelled to show that not all
Hoosiers view refugees with
suspicion or fear. One person even posted on IRIS’s Facebook page an
offer to give the family free Hula-Hoop lessons.
Sometimes generosity knows no boundaries.
For more information, go to: www.beverlyhillsimmigrationlaw.com
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